Life As I See It… Episode 2

What has come over me?

Over the past weeks I have taken up a crazy habit – not being able to say no to alcohol. This is different, it seems strange but yes, every evening I’m drinking stuff: bourbon, vodka ( in fact, the number of brands got me thinking I could possibly begin to produce some of this shit….lol), champagne, beer…anything that contains alcohol including chocolate…na my own bad pass ni?

Today was different. Woke up, had breakfast and started drinking. Shared bottles of Red label (one of Jonnie Walker’s favourite) with friends…was tipsy as early as 11am while watching Savages and I got thinking. From a woman’s point of view, Savages tells the story of a girl and her two lovers (and she claims to love them equally oh…kosi wahala) and guess how she differentiates them….Sex! One makes love to her and the other fucks the shit outta her. In her own words about the latter, she says “I have orgasms and he has War-gasms”. Also about how far they went to get her back after she was kidnapped. Don’t ask about my point of view…a man’s always gonna see it some other way.

Hey…get outta Genesis Deluxe Cinemas and come back to my world joooooor…..

I got thinking about this phase I happen to be in now and fortunately for me I had more alcohol to keep the thoughts flowing. That phase where you begin to wonder where life’s headed and how to steer life in the right direction. That phase where you feel you can’t afford to make any more mistakes. What things I have done, what things I shouldn’t have done, what things I still want to do and what things I wouldn’t want to do. Places I should be and places I should never have been to. People I cherish and I people I dread. Relationships I’ve been in and why they all failed…then one tiny wire snapped in the front hemisphere of this tiny brain. Yes, I remembered the only girl I have ever loved…jeeez! Unfortunately…a surge of adrenaline. Heart started beating like crazy with the thought of someone chewing her fucking hole and having war-gasms, making her moan like crazy – as if his cock is super charged and vibrates like the engine of a maserati…na him bad pass?

I met this girl a while ago, it’s close to 7 years. Dated her for about 2 years and since then I haven’t had any meaningful relationship (6months here, 2months there etc). Moved on after the break-up but kept an ear on the ground to know how she was doing…yes I “loved” her. Somewhat later, after she moved to where I was, I assumed we could start something. I was mistaken. Time like they say flies and if you really don’t keep tabs, you’d be lost. They say in 5years, a kid can grow up and even dance azonto excellently…alas she’s grown.

We got talking again recently and I decided to it a shot again! I am as dumb as can be…( well, just up to about last week and just when it comes to relationships). I basically sacrificed my dignity and screwed myself from behind, telling her how much I loved and cherished her. Eventually got her to agree to meet with me so we could spend time together, talk, possibly share a drink et all and guess what…

She couldn’t spend 30minutes with me.

How silly that was. To think that I stood a chance. Twice in 6 months I realised that I have not even been able to get a lady to value me to say the least…

Just then it occurred to me how much I needed to get laid…LMAO

When you get to think about all the kinda stuff you’ve been put through in the course of having relationships, one might wonder if it’s worth it eventually. After all, nothing is guaranteed – even love. Maximise the time you have with loved ones – family and friends (…including those with benefits) but don’t be stupid. Some things aren’t worth it…and so are some people.

She’s outta my life for good…and she ain’t even gonna be in my thoughts no more!

Thank God It’s Thursday…going out to get some more liquor, chillax and have fun!

That’s life…live it to the fullest!


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